I’m living in lots of introspection right now.
With the passing of my two cousins I spoke of last week and others I know who are struggling now, my introspection has increased.
Do you find yourself living in introspection at times in your life too?
I ran into one of my friends here in Minnesota and spoke about what has been going on in her life and mine. I told her I wasn’t sure what I’d write my blog about today.
She said, “talk about all of this. There may be others out there like myself, going through things in their own lives or with people they love, who need words of encouragement.”
So hence the topic of my article. God has a way of putting people and experiences into our lives that help us to have this introspection and perhaps come up with some answers.
After my second cousin in just over 3 weeks passed away, I talked with another friend at our health club about what was going on. I was angry when I spoke to her, asking some questions neither of us had answers to. I saw her the other day at the health club, after I returned from Toledo.
We talked once again about life and some of the things I’ve been introspective about. She said after she saw me the week before, she was concerned about me. She hadn’t ever seen me in the state of negativity I was in. After talking yesterday, I told her I had more peace about things than the week before. Something else she shared with me I had never known; she looked up to me as a role model.
I told her even “role models” go through difficult times.
We shared our feelings about how when life throws you curves, it’s each of our responsibility to get back on track as soon as you can. And it’s OK to take a pause, have the feelings you’re experiencing, and allow yourself to feel them.
I was so very aware and introspective while I was back in Toledo with my parents, my siblings and families, my friend from childhood, Sharon, and my cousins.
My feelings of appreciation have been greater. As I said in last week’s article, none of us have a guarantee of how long we will be here. Life is so very precious and fragile.
I spoke with my parent’s minister, Ruby, who attended my cousin’s funeral and my cousins minister who officiated that day. I heard my cousins minister say at the end of the funeral, that “Mary chose to leave in her own time frame.” This is the question I spoke with both about.
Do we choose when we go, when we leave this earth?
Her minister said, he may want to take that out of the funeral services he does, since he really isn’t sure. My parents minister said she wasn’t sure, and she would get back to me this week with what she found in the Bible.
Ruby did get back to me. Here’s what she wrote to me from Job 1:21:
“The absence of the breath of life determines death. God breathed life into man. The scripture tells us that God giveith and the Lord takeith.”
She went on to say, “Depending upon who is doing the interpretation, one could say that when our physical breath is gone, it caused the exit of our soul. When God calls us home, he retracts the breath of life and along with that comes the spirit and the soul.
It is God who decides our death and not the soul, which comes from God.”
So, what do you think?
See I told you I’ve been very introspective!
The bottom line for me as far as my cousin Mary is concerned; if she would have lived, her physical body would have been very damaged since she was without the oxygen the human body needs to be healthy. Her counts were very low for too long, I learned. Given that, I know Mary wouldn’t want to stay here in that condition.
Even though her daughter is getting married next year, and she was excited to help her pick out her dress soon, and all that comes with a wedding, Mary needed to leave.
Here’s a site you may want to look at with several quotes about introspection:
Once again, I’m left with a knowing that we each need to slow down, count our blessings, appreciate, be kind, and show our love for others. Often. Each day.
Savor and cherish your present moments.
This is what I know for sure.
With love and appreciation,
To read more of my blogs:
PS. Here is the Emotional Scale for you to look at to be aware of where you’re at. This scale is a help to me. Maybe it will be to you too.